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News

I'be been Ghosted

Published: January 10, 2019

The last 3 months have been kind of strange.  I had someone who I thought was a close friend dump me over an absolutely ridiculous reason.  I think they were looking for a reason to dump me.  We shared many situations, ups, downs, cries, cats, etc. for almost 14 years.  I decided to be the bigger person and sent a holiday card and a couple of texts saying "I hope we can get back on track again."  I then received a message from a third party saying stop.  (2 texts?)  So I deleted this person's info from my phone, etc.  Another person who is going through very hard, abusive times dumped me.  This person's thug of a boyfriend has sent her to the ER at least 3 times and she is going to marry him.  I was trying to advise but she dumped me.  Then, our bowling teammate suddenly dropped off into "ghost land."

So I don't know what is going on with the universe right now.  I guess I need to do some housecleaning on my own, as well, physical housecleaning (oh that #@! refrigerator and pantry)...but the universe has weeded out some toxins for me, apparently. 

I didn't know my friend's departure from my life would make the impact it has.  I'm hurting.  But I have to put together what has happened over that 14 year span.  This person disappeared for a whole year with "radio silence" and then reappeared.  They were never really there when I thought they would be, missing a lot of special events and stuff I would invite them to.  I always acknowledged their birthdays and anniversaries, etc.  I believe in celebrating life!  Yet in the end, this time around, I was accused of the relationship being "all about me."  I was astounded when I heard that one, then remembered about "deflection."  I had a dream just last night that this person showed up in my life again and we picked up where we left off...happily...but I know that won't ever be the case again.

I found a great article online: 8 Things You Should Avoid Doing After Being Ghosted by Someone and I did violate one of them by sending 2 texts.  I've realized the potholes in that relationship and need to journal (offline) about it.  No sense in getting a restraining order filed against me - and I believe this person would not hesitate to do that as they are very emotional. 

On a bright note, I received the Best.  Performance.  Appraisal.  Ever.  in my 20+ year career of making this-here-kinda websites.  I'm in a nice, secure position with a public agency where security reigns.  My boss told me I bring a light and warmth to the Team that was much needed.  That was amazing to hear.  So I'll run with that and put those negative, toxic people behind me.